Monster

I try to reconnect with friends
but they all retreat with scorn
It's a pain to even touch them
'cause they prick my hands with thorns
maybe I'm the reason for this torture
then again I could be wrong
I refuse to spring back and forth
like a ball during ping pong
my vocal expressions put me
in places I don't wanna be
I guess the freedom of speech
really does set you free
what have I been doing?
who is this monster I've become
this headache is pounding in my head
like the beating of a bongo drum
in no way, shape or form
do I mean to attack
all this self hating does nothing
but corner me in traps
that I can't even get out of
they're impossible to escape from
It'll take forever to break free
has the devil really won?
I can't blame him this time
for this was my own fault
the impact keeps hitting me
in many forms of assault
you know what maybe I'm right
but so what shit happens
I'm only human I make mistakes
we all do so stop bashing